The Up & Down Emotions of a Diagnosis Part V: Lesson Learned

May 27, 2011
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Did I make the right decision by not going to the camp?

I don’t know that I can answer that question or if anyone can. All I am sure of is that I have multiple sclerosis and the camp was for individuals like me with the exact same thing. Will I ever get MS with that type of severity? I don’t know. Time will be the only thing that will ever be able to tell me that. Doctors don’t know. Friends and family can tell you that you won’t out of mere comfort, but they don’t really know either.

Just like anything in life, you can’t let your fears stop you from being who you are or who you eventually want to be. I know my decision not to go to the camp won’t stop me from being who I want to be in the long run, but I see now that perhaps my reaction to the camp is something I shouldn’t make a habit out of.

Since I’ve been diagnosed, I have had my fair share of challenges and critical decisions that needed to be made in my life. I had a period of time when I didn’t want to move on. I resented what was happening to me and just wanted to hide away from the world and give up. However, through growing up and facing my fears I was able to live my life again. I was able to pick myself up and move on.

I think my experiences in life as a whole is very symbolic of what I just went through with this recent reaction to my MS. For a split second, I didn’t want to fundraise anymore. I didn’t want to meet others with MS. I didn’t want to share my story. I didn’t want to accept the fact I had it. I wanted to give up all efforts toward the cause.

However, I can’t let that attitude be my train of thought. I truly believe I have a very mild case of the illness to inspire others, to raise money, to participate in charity events for not only individuals with multiple sclerosis but other illnesses as well. Through me, hopefully people can see that just because I have been diagnosed with something on a piece of paper I am not going to let it define who I am today. I am a young adult that has my entire life ahead of me. I’m not going to let MS or any other downfall in my life stop me from becoming who I am supposed to be.

Whether a person has a very mild or severe case of an illness or even no illness at all everyone must face challenges in their life and be able to deal with them. If you deal with them in the right manner you may just learn from them. Perhaps, I didn’t deal with this challenge the “right” way, but I do think I learned something from it….Life throws us challenges. We just need to look at them head on and no matter how we react to the challenge at that time; hopefully a lesson will eventually be learned.

Author: Jess